Each of us is navigating along the same human spectrum, sometimes falling toward the middle, sometimes at one end or another.  Although your urges aren't common, they are not "unnatural."  They are natural and normal for you.  Our challenge is to find those who accept and love us AS WE ARE, not as they would prefer us to be.   

Dear Betsy,

i'm male but i desire to be female and a lesbian. i have unnatural urges towards girls,wanting them to touch me like i am female. why do i feel like this?i also get an intense thrill when i see two women engaged in sexual acts. should i consider a sex change? i am unable to perform normal sex with a girl, i just want her to have me as a female.

Thanks, "Jenny"

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Dear Jenny,

Thanks for writing.  It took courage.  I'm not an expert in this area, but there are lots of people out there to help you find your way.  Here's a link you may find helpful: transgender support  network.  It's important for you to find others who have struggled with similar issues so that you don't feel alone--as I'm guessing you have been for quite some time. 

Good luck to you.  I believe that none of us is completely one thing or another--100% this or that. Each of us is navigating along the same human spectrum, sometimes falling toward the middle, sometimes at one end or another.  Although your urges aren't common, they are not "unnatural." They are natural and normal for you.  Our challenge is to find those who can accept and love us AS WE ARE, not as others would prefer us to be.   

Trust that you will find your way and your community. 

Betsy